How to start getting what you want

People often work with me because they really want something that is not happening in their lives at the moment. Examples of this include clarity about a situation, fulfilling the success they want in their careers, and feeling good about themselves, though there are many more reasons why people are stuck and not flowing.

One of the biggest hurdles to people being able to obtain what they want is that they are so busy looking, consumed in a cloud of activity. There is no space for what they want to appear, and using the analogy of a garden, they are so busy dealing with the weeds, there is no time to appreciate and nurture the little seedlings of desire.

This activity is not restricted to physical busy-ness. Great physical activity is often a symptom of a very active mind, a mind keeping itself busy trying to figure out ‘how’ it can get what it thinks it wants.

What the mind is not very good at is separating those thoughts which are useful in getting what it wants from those thoughts which get in the way. So people often reach a stage of utter frustration, trying harder, doing more, in an effort to get what they want.

One of the most important factors in actualising what you want is stilling the mind from being active in those areas which are getting in the way, and distracting you from bringing forward the thoughts which will help you achieve what you want. By doing this, a space appears – silence.

Into that space, it is possible to put thoughts which move you forward, rather than sabotaging your efforts and holding you back. Then you start attracting what you really want, like a magnet.

This sounds easy, so why isn’t everyone doing it already?

Well, people are not very often aware of the thoughts which are holding them back. They are located in ‘blind spot’ areas – it is very difficult to see them for yourself. When you know about what is in your blind spot area, you can deal with it effectively. Until then, you will carry on operating without even being aware that they are there, while they continue to sabotage you and take energy. By distinguishing what thoughts and feelings are hidden in your blind spots, it is possible to release yourself from their impact, and create the space into which you can allow ‘useful’ thoughts to come.

Then life gets a lot easier. You don’t feel like you are trying to drive a car forward with the brakes on at the same time. Things flow. What you want starts coming towards you much more freely, and you have far more energy available for the important things in life.

So, take a little time each day to be still, or even better, give me a call – take a little time to learn to listen to yourself. Then amazing things can happen!

About theclaritycoach

Paul Stonehouse is an experienced coach, educator and speaker, and is completely committed to helping people perform at their best. His particular passion is helping people move forward when they are stuck, enabling them to live and work a in a way which is a confident expression of their true selves.
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